No sport offers up a more bewildering array of souvenir crap memorabilia than NASCAR, and They Make It digs deep into the corners of the Internet to bring all that strangeness to light. Today: the finest in high-quality eyewear.
The item: The Jimmie Johnson gnome, $19.99 from CBS Sports Store
The deal: Friends, I think we've done it. I think we've cracked the code. I think we now know why Jimmie Johnson is the most dominant NASCAR driver of the modern era:
It's the gnome! It's this little guy who's bringing luck to Jimmie and woe to his mates! Seriously, look at that little ugly guy, with his bulbous nose and his not-quite-Santa-esque beard. He just screams menace, doesn't he? Just imagine waking up and seeing that guy standing on the end of your bed. Would freak you out something fierce, right? Now imagine if that guy was everywhere you were trying to be, all up in your head. Friends, after detailed review of photographic evidence, that's exactly what seems to be happening. Look below ... if you dare.
Mark Martin awaits the race, blissfully unaware he's being watched ... and stalked.
"Look, honey, Ella's found a toy ... NO! ELLA! NO! GET AWAY!!!!"
I feel rather certain that if you dug into your own photo files, you might find a gnome or two secreted away. Oh, and thanks to Art Tidesco for this find. If you've got gnome pics of your own -- or any other NASCARiana -- send it to jay.busbee@yahoo.com.
No comments:
Post a Comment